Slim

Another good article in the Scotsman: http://sport.scotsman.com/sport/When-the-world-woke-up.4049319.jp

Is that someone's back garden they're playing in?

Yup, he signed for that team no-one's heard of after being released by JDV's old team de Graffschap. I don't think he gets a game for that tiny Dutch club no-one's heard of's first team either as he's listed on the A squad (reserves presumably?) on their website. He'll be a replacement for Jon Smith/Dyron Daal/et al.

We're in the final? Ace. The real UEFA Cup is for losers anyway.

Not got many other options unfortunately.

I think I've got one of those somewhere after collecting tokens from boxes of Coco Pops.

155 games for Aberdeen V 150 games for Dunfermline in which he has barely kicked a ball.

Must be Palenik: 6 foot 3" central defender, 31 years old.

Again, according to Soccerbase, not sure how accurate they are but they list every match he's played in, he's played in 22 games, has scored 2 goals and has been sent off twice. Must be someone else surely?

Well if he played here for 5 years and didn't show us what he was capable of then went to Dunfermline for 3 years and barely kicked a ball, then I'd reckon he was a bone idle workshy fop that we shouldn't touch with a shitty stick.

The difference is that players like Dixon and to a lesser extent Stevenson are young and have potential to improve quite a lot, Darren Young peaked years ago, we know what he is capable of and at his best, he was barely better than average.

He's a 30 year old striker who is 6ft 7". We're obviously planning on playing flowing passing football next season. Oh and his goal haul for this season is 2 according to Soccerbase.

http://www.thedandies.co.uk/messageboard/index.php?topic=3759.msg48832#msg48832 Zemlik is a centre forward isn't he or do they have 2 Poles?

Daily Star reckons we're after: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gary_McDonald

Not sure about that as his latest moniker is slagging off the article on the Hat.

While I'd like Miller to stay, he's got some fucking cheek considering we rescued him from Dundee Utd reserves and continued to pay his over inflated wages then waited 6 months for him to even break sweat.

If this is true, I'll be fucking furious. God help the first gormless pleb to try and defend the signing, especially if it involves a comparison to Derek Young "rising above all expectations"

Any other news Santino?

This guy? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ricky_van_den_Bergh Hits a good free kick: http://101greatgoals.magnify.net/item/F7V9N5V25HZL0Y9S Some stats here: http://soccernet.espn.go.com/players/stats?id=67482&cc=5739 Lists him there as a striker but the Heracles website lists him as a midfielder: http://www.heracles.nl/1b82ff1b-d487-40b1-a9ea-086a7bfa6020.aspx?SpelerId=62

No. 2 - Paul Dixon The left back position has long been a problem for us, I think we could do a lot worse than have a look at highly rated Scotland U21 international Paul Dixon of Dundee. Dundee rejected a bid from Norwich last summer believed to be around £100k. Killie tried to sign him in the January transfer window but failed. His contract runs out this summer and will be leaving Dens Park Scott Robertson from Dundee is also out of contract and would be a good signing, rumoured to be going to Tannadice, but I think Dixon is the better signing and would slot straight into our team.

I get the impression that Calderwood needs some help identifying good players who could actually improve the team, so lets compile a list of available quality players for no-one to pay any attention to. No. 1 - Marcel Seip http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/t...yle/7335091.stm I've been looking on Plymouth forums fairly regularly to see how Anderson is getting on and just about everyone thinks this guy is the best thing since sliced bread, and rate him higher than Anderson. Still got another year on his contract but has fallen out with Sturrock so might be able to get him for a small fee.

Christ, yet more embarrassment thanks to the orange buffoon.

I'd rather we didn't sign him, I couldn't handle the punnery if we did.

"he knows how to score goals." He's scored a total of 4 goals in his entire career He's also fucking gash.

Nope, very clear it didn't go in.