Doubt this joke will work due to hardly anyone knowing the former terrible Swindon winger Ricky Shakes who Paul Sturrock released on a freebie
Following the news this week about Paul Sturrock, we now know why he was so keen to get rid of Shakes.
Two Scotsmen are working on a building site in Glasgow, Jim & Tam. Jim turns to Tam & says,
'Av gotta take a piss, but there's nowhere to go, eh.'
'Walk oot tae the end of the plank,' replies Tam.
'I'll stand on this end & balance it.'
'Are you sure, Tam?'
'Aye, no worries'
'100%?'
'AYE!'
So out goes Jim to take a piss & the lunch siren sounds, Tam forgets what he's supposed to be doing & steps off the plank & Jim is a goner.
Several days later an Australian, a Frenchman & a Scotsman are sitting in a bar discussing which of their respective nations chase women the hardest...
The Aussie says,
'Mate I've been known to miss a piss up session down the Pub with me mates trying to crack on to sheilas!'
Pierre, the Frenchman says,
'No, No, No, Ve French chase ze women with much zest & give them gifts of love like French champagne to win their affection, it is us vor sure.'
Meanwhile Rab the Scotsman sits laughing & says,
'No, you blokes are both wrong, the other day I was walking past a building site in Glasgow following these 2 gorgeous looking birds, and this bloke came plummeting from the sky with his dick in his hand screaming,
'CUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNTTTTTTTTTT!!!'
What's pink and covered in cobwebs?
Madeline McCann's bike