royal deeside cowie

Scheduled a weekend in Kos in October with a couple of Sultan big hitters. In two minds whether to take the clubs. I could rent a set there but it wouldn't be the same.

You have to move with the times, brother. Its easy to sit there and look back with notions of contrived nostalgia. An attitude frequently employed by the older generation, the tartan trousered bufty brigade, those who didn't have the talent to make their mark on the game.

Appalling behaviour from the pair of you, as expected. The assessment of data is now in the 1000 club. You won't be privy to that though. But I'm sure you can imagine. If there's one thing you can take from this it's not to jump in with preconceptions about people and judge people just because you've found yourself a safe little enclave where you can express yourself without question or reason. Tup was snuggling in nicely to Rocket's bosom until he began to rattle. The shaking was akin to a bag of spanners. Tup knows he needs to tread carefully after his past indiscretion. Perhaps he found Rocket Scientist as a safe haven. In the end they were nothing more than two men with damaged reputations bound in madness.

I don't like to get too caught up in data, I'm a feel player. Only time I've ever paid any attention to my stats is when I tested a Titleist TS2 9.5 degree driver with a HZRDUS Smoke 6.5 extra stiff shaft. A marked improvement in ball speed, spin and distance compared to my usual Project X 6.0 stiff. I asked the pro to let me now try a HZRDUS 6.0 to compare. He said I didn't need that shaft anymore. I have been using the 6.5 ever since and it can feel dead the first few strikes. You definitely need a good warm up on the range before puting it into play on the course.

Stop the abuse, Rocket brother. This why Bebo had to give you your marching orders. Take a leaf out of the jacobite's book and keep a lid on your rage.

You can't keep hiding behind your wife forever, brother. Using her as a pawn in your quest for control is cold and callous. Your methods are unsound and it may be the case we have to send in some of the NE's finest to free the natives from your vice-like grip. You are using them as nothing more than errand boys, in this, the compound in which you have become so comfortable and unchallenged.

My dearest brother. There is concern about the Colonel Kurtz-like spell you hold the natives under here. The mutant hordes are gathering, ready to breach your turret and release these men from the trance you have cast upon them.

The issue of sex being worth sacrifice was discussed at length with myself, Manboobs and Fridge a few weeks ago. Allow me to pare down the findings of the group into a couple of simple sentences, brother: Good sex is like good wine. Once you pop the cork you need to savour every drop.

Oh dear, Mr Scientist now back pedalling at a furious rate.

I couldn't watch the end of the golf. Popov reminded me too much of my ex wife in her early years. There was some bad blood when we parted ways, I try to erase her from my mind and seeing Popov brought the memories flooding back. The only memories worth revisiting are memories of the sex. The sex was a revelation, brother.

Stuck a pony on Hayley Moore yesterday morning with the intention of purchasing a new PXG driver with the winnings. If she pulls it off now l could be in line for a full set plus tour bag.

Amen to that, brother. You strike me as a Colonel Kurtz figure round these here parts.

My sources tell me McCrorie goes straight into the team for the visit to Perth

Just stuck a pony on Meronk. If this comes in theres a pint in the tank at Drummonds waiting for you when lockdown eases next week.

Your game was at its peak back then, laddie. Got your handicap down to 22. There so many like yourself in the NE who talk a good game while lacking the basics. Old gammons full of hot air are the scurge of the modern day golf club, brother.

You`re a 25 handicapper, brother. Katie Price could speak with more authority on golf than you.

Lies

Put the fishing rod away, shorty. Its too early for haddock and chips. I sense you are going to be reunited with ghosts from your past very soon in the form of Millertime and Piddler. The natives are restless, brother.

He`ll never change

Brooks was an inspiration last week, brother. He spurred the chasing pack with his harsh words while taking a step back to let youth shine through. Just a pity you're too much of a moron to identify reverse psychology. I'm embarrassed for you.

Rocket man's a 25 handicapper with an insight into the tour even Lee Westwood's ex wife wasn't privvy to. An absolute fantasist getting more delusional with age.

Our lives followed very different paths. But there was a time when we were free as the wind. I remember your excitement at Milne's takeover and the hope it brought. With age comes the burden of responsibility. But there was a time when we could have done anything. We could have moved mountains, brother. We could have been heroes.

Roll up, roll up, all aboard the Morikawa bandwagon. Your insights are copied wholesale from Sky Sports European Tour analysis. For too long you've been living in a fantasy, brother. We need to take you to a psychiatrist.

And rightly so. There's no other way forward than make an example of these swaggering dimwits. Can you imagine being sat at that table with these boring anonymous cunts? They weren't discussing economics.

Stop stoking the fire with your poker stick. Most decent upstanding NE men are known to mellow in old age. You appear to be the exception to the rule. You become more abrasive and delusional (ie. lying about your involvement with pro golfers) with every year that goes by. No-one will ever change you, my dearest brother. But at least acknowledge good grace and decency once and a while amidst your appalling rants.