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Un-PC jokes (If your easily offended don't open)


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Guest leith_red

Just a basic domestic disturbance, the experts believe that this will result in a civil action.

 

 

 

It was an unlucky phenomenon for the boy in the plastic bubble bath.

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Slipped on some grease and had a perfect blow out, he let out a shout but in that mad city it wasn't heard. John made a bolt for him, he tried to be cool but moment by moment staying alive was no longer an option, a thin red line of blood appeared on the eyes of an angel.

If only John could read this. Would definitely result in a face-off.
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A kid came up to me the other day and asked "whats your favourite tellytubby?"

I said the "probably the new Samsung Plasma widescreen you cheeky wee fucker"

 

I'm going to rob a bank tomorrow dressed as a clown in my wives thong and nipple tassles. I'll be carrying a blind 3 legged goat with a dildo up its arse. In the bank the goat's gonna suck me off whilst I throw pig's blood over the room whilst shouting 'big flabby pissflaps'. Once I get the cash I'm gonna shit on the bank managers head and escape in a big pink van shaped like a giant cock

 

Lets see Crimewatch stage a reconstruction of that then!

 

Al Fayed wants to sign Ronaldo for Fulham. Not for his football ability but to show chauffers how to crash safely in tunnels.

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