Radiored

At the home of the dodgers of soap, Down a goal and a man, not a hope. Then a goal by Kenan! Get it up ya ye fenians! But alas, twas a slippery slope.

3-1 .... bollocks!

Ach fuck! ...

YYYAAAASSSSS!!! ... Bilalovic 1-1

1-0 ... boooooooo

Huns gettin' spanked by Farts . 2-0 tae the diets.

Aye, it's written in the stars .... but only in pencil! ... Come on JT, an' COYR .... Ging ower it wi a big thick permanent marker pen afore some cunt gings ower it wi a rubber!

Stayin' wi' the cheapest sweeties of auld, like maist sweetie shops, the shop across the road fae Kittybrewster Primary School had an array o' big jars on a high up shelf ... the cheapest per quarter was the cinnamon balls .... which Ah loved. Even better, ye didna hae tae buy a full quarter pun ... ye could ask for 2 ounces ... which was plenty for a wee laddie ... an' cost aboot 2 an' a half pence

As a bairn ma fave cheap sweeties ( as in 2, 3 for 1p) were prob Lemfizz, Bazooka Joes, Fruit Salads, Mojos. Ah liked sports mix ... especially cos they were 5 for a penny, but Ah hated the black anes. Many a time Ah would ask "5p o' sports .. nae blacks". .... an' aboot half the time the wifie (it wis nearly ayewis a wifie) would look at ma wi an expression which read "Are you haein a fuckin fun??" and would stick the scoop intae the sports mix indiscriminately an' coont oot the sweeties intae the bag .... blacks 'unfiltered'. Actually, Ah think there wis usually a disproportionate number o' black anes - oot o' spite, in reaction tae fit Ah thought wis a reasonable request. Still, like a bampot, Ah'd hand ower ma 5p. Anither firm fave wis 'Crispets' ... ye can still get them, but they cost a fkn fortune ... same goes wi Chelsea Whoppers

Ah loved the wee section far the cameras went tae the Celtic fans leavin' early, then showed the StMirren fans wavein' them cheerio

GIRFUY!

YASS! .... 3-1 St Midden

.... and Buddies 2-1 up .... A think a drink might be in order

Fkn great! ...

YYAAAAASSSS!! ... 2-1 .... Order has been restored

YASSSSS!! 1-1

Nae pen ... thank fuck!

Aw tae fuck .... penalty ... ? VAR check.

FFS! ... 0-1

Thanks RED TV for displaying Polvara's first name as 'ANTE'

Come on tae fuck .... it's nae difficult ... jist get it done

Ach shite .... 0-1

YYAAAASSSS!!! ... 1-0 ... Knoester ..... Ach fuck .... VAR has equalised ... 0-0 ...

Right now, the mutton molesters, Take on the frog leg digesters Will we win? I say"Oui", but if nae, Cest la vie, Jist get right in aboot the hoormesters.

Aye weel, fair enough, but it's less clear an' obvious if ye dinna follow fitba in England and elsewhere ... which I dinna.