Jump to content

Saturday 4 May 2024:  kick-off 3pm

Scottish Premiership - Aberdeen v St Johnstone

🔴⚪️ Come on you Reds! ⚪🔴

Olympics 2012


Kowalski

Recommended Posts

  • 2 weeks later...
  • Replies 280
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Olympic ticket applicants receive first set of clues

02-06-11

OLYMPICS ticket applicants have been posted an elliptic set of messages that will eventually reveal what sport they will be watching.

 

As entirely random amounts of money were taken from bank accounts, the person behind the clues for Ted Rogers' 3-2-1 was brought out of retirement, along with an army of cryptic crossword compilers, to write the receipts.

 

Baffled Carlisle purchaser, Wayne Hayes, said: "I got a slip confirming I'd paid £385 and a scroll of parchment saying ‘What walks on the earth but cannot see sky? Its eyes number 20, but has just six thighs'.

 

"There was also a train ticket to Knutsford and a false moustache in the envelope.

"Am I going to the rowing, the opening ceremony or the official firing of Seb Coe? For all I know I may even be competing in the bloody thing."

 

The next stage will be a series of adverts directed by David Lynch and Darren Aronofsky featuring dream sequences and mathematical equations that will, according to organisers, 'spark image clouds in the collective unconsciousness of the public which will gradually reveal to them whether they managed to get to see any athletics or not'.

 

The ticket lottery method is being adopted by other companies including Ryanair, whose owner Michael O'Leary was drawn to the arbitrary and completely unfair aspects.

 

A spokesman said: "From next April a custumer who wants to go to Alicante could find they have actually bought 200kg of freight space in a flight to Uzbekistan."

 

But the process was criticised by Olympologist, Tom Logan, who said: “In China everybody knew seven years in advance what event they'd be going to see and how many times they would be required to clap their hands together.

 

"The only thing we've got right is telling Boris Johnson to piss up a rope."

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Get yourself to Thomas Cook Manc, my cousin has bought a package for athletics with beach volleyball thrown in  ;)

 

Fuck that, the cunts didn't want our money first time round. I'd rather book a holiday than pay a travel agent for something I could organise myself. Fucking ridiculous that some folk have been allocated £30k worth of tickets (when the intention is blatantly to sell them at a profit) and others haven't been allocated ANY of those that they have chosen in consideration of what they could afford.

 

The sad thing is I'm considering not entering the ballot for the paralympics now as its the same corrupt fuckers

running that, despite how much fun blind cricket and football sound  ;D.

 

Good thing fitba is run by much more trustworthy and fair organisations...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Fuck that, the cunts didn't want our money first time round. I'd rather book a holiday than pay a travel agent for something I could organise myself. Fucking ridiculous that some folk have been allocated £30k worth of tickets (when the intention is blatantly to sell them at a profit) and others haven't been allocated ANY of those that they have chosen in consideration of what they could afford.

 

The sad thing is I'm considering not entering the ballot for the paralympics now as its the same corrupt fuckers

running that, despite how much fun blind cricket and football sound  ;D.

 

Good thing fitba is run by much more trustworthy and fair organisations...

 

I agree, the whole process has been a complete farce from start to finish - and the folk who have ended up with thouands of pounds worth of tickets get the chance to sell them on when they decide they don't want them  :hammer:

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Run by the govt for the benefit of London and londoners.

 

I hate to say I telt ye so back when it was announced, but...................................... :-[

 

Right, I'll bite, how the fuck does this benefit me? Causes humongous hassle in terms of transport and cost of house and living accommodation. I am yet to see or be convinced that any of this will directly make my life better . I don't plan to live on the site and bloody crossrail, well I couldn't care less. All I want is my overground station to work on a fucking Sunday ! :hammer:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


×
×
  • Create New...