hercule poirot

^ To add to above... He asked me if I had a price in mind for the car I was trading in. I informed him I had, as being no slouch I had done my homework as to estimated value via the Internet 

He was derisive of this approach as its preferable to see and kick the tyres of a vehicle to give a true value. 

He then offered me more than I had been offered virtually!!!! 

Car salesmen, no match for a trooper such as myself. 

Today I also paid for my new car. 

Got a cracking deal, drove the sales gadgie down to what I was willing to pay rather than what he was asking for. 

Boot mat, gap insurance and paint protection all included. 

No email chains a mile long with some spiv from Doncaster and no endless phone calls about inconsequential trivial crap in an attempt to save £123.50.

 Bull by the horns, that's the way I roll. 

Today I hadn't noticed a Teams message from the CEO until around an hour after it was sent. 

He's aware I go out for a stroll around lunchtime, so in my reply I apologised for the delay and informed him, in error, that I had been out for a 'wank' 

10 minutes ago, Elgindon said:

What a redd up. Not sure why theyre complaining so much if they knew they were in breach of protocol. Sounds like some of them are looking for reasons to leave 

Ken. 

If I was to make of an arse of it at work (not that I would, top of my game me), then I would expect to be sacked regardless of my contract of employment. 

Why do football players and useless managers apparently get paid to the end of their term of employment? 

Fair point. He's likely on less money than Bryson, and a few others at Aberdeen. 

43 minutes ago, rocket_scientist said:

I also take anything like that with a barrowful of seasoning. Unless the source is known, it's likely be to be hot air. The reason why sick people blow hot air is to make themselves feel important, them likely to be spectacularly unimportant and inconsequential in their sad lives.

The slipping of basic education standards is a perennial problem but the lapses in religious education is the bigger issue. They don't even know their ten commandments let alone Luther 03 19.

Luther Vandross? 

Martin Luther King? 

Whatchoo talkin about Willis? 

^ He's on loan. Actually. 

I did not ask as to his source. 

He's a slater by trade, salt of the earth. Good at darts also. 

My source is the guy who I drink a lot of beer with at weekends. 

He whatsapped me earlier. 

Cosgrove and Mckenna have submitted transfer requests. 

Logan, McGeough also to be shown the door.

Edit to add: Hedges away in addition. 

^ there's a website that's worth playing with, can't remember it's name. 

You enter in your garden dimensions and play around adding trees, walls, decking borders etc.. Then you can walk round it in 3d.

Hopefully that fantasist clown rocket isn't your neighbour. 

One of my mates is a tree cutterer and he has one of those stump removal machines

I've not asked him for a price yet though

Presumably you're from Elgin? May be a bit far for him to travel 

22 minutes ago, hercule poirot said:

Did you and Mrs rocket hang your love padlock onto the railings at the fuegh? 

And if you did, was it a little fat squeaky padlock? 

Thanks for the kind offer. 

See if you paint your fence, presumably, even with the best will in the world, some of the paint will go through to your neighbours side. 

Do you have to come to an agreement with them to both use the same colour paint? 

And the mower has a slow puncture. 

First World problems. 

28 minutes ago, Elgindon said:

If I'd known it was as nice inland,would have headed for some hills,...but,worked a half day, followed by a bit of gardening at home....

 

That could be an entrant in the bonny garden competition. Well done sir, clearly a lot of time and effort gone into that. 

I recently dug out a lot of borders, lay down some weed cover sheeting and filled with 10mt of chuckies. 

I've too many borders so some had to go. Next on the agenda is remove 6 of the 14 trees. That won't be cheap... 

3 hours ago, rocket_scientist said:

In order to escape the cloud and the haar, we got on to the South Deeside Road and headed inland. Great decision. Had lunch at Potarch in the most perfect weather and I mean literally, the best conditions that the world has ever seen, let alone the UK, Scotland and the NE.

Folk were swimming in the Dee and it looked magic. Nice drive by Finzean and Strachan etc., great views of Cairn O Mount and much as it's a beautiful part of the world, I couldn't live there. Too many English and English wannabes, a Tory stronghold full of plummy accents and total fuds. However I've never seen the water levels in the Feugh and the Dee so low: -

Did you and Mrs rocket hang your love padlock onto the railings at the fuegh? 

I appreciate your words of advice, thank you. 

But.. I'm old skool, I prefer to see, touch, drive and then make my mind up. 

As you know, car salesmanship is not a vocation, it's a last resort job for those who have fallen by the wayside. I'd prefer to decide while standing looking at the product rather than rely on some uneducated anonymous oik to get things correct. 

Thanks again though. 

You're boring me now. 

On a completely different subject, I'm away down to Dundee today to buy a car. 

9 hours ago, rocket_scientist said:

Coincidentally my book mark is last years fixture list: -

And it's the same fixtures EVERY year.

Will you now concede you're an ignorant bastard?

My point proven. Thank you. 

From January to June there are 14 medals mentioned on your itinerary. The remainder being a mixture of assorted competitions. 

So, if we duplicate the first half of the year to include July to December, we can assume a maximum of thirty (30) medal competitions per year. 

That's assuming the weather will be favourable every single time. Unlikely. 

6 hours ago, rocket_scientist said:

Hrmph  

I reckon it's one of the toughest mental examinations there is. Used to be addicted to playing it - 50 medal rounds during the year my youngest was born, not including bounce games, match play events and team matches - but more happy watching it getting done properly these days and like all habits, we fall in and out of them. Haven't played since Panmure in December and turned down an invitation this week to play Troon next week with one of my pro clients I invented in my multiple personality imagination. Missing being out there though. Carnoustie was so good last week for a couple of days but this year will be the first time for over a decade I haven't been to the best course on the planet, the Lytham Trophy having been cancelled.

On girly matters, what do you think of Yoga? The new mat that my wife ordered came today and I tried it for the first time during lockdown when daughter 2 was home and showed me. It's fucking tougher than it looks. I refrained from doing a down dog as my postie asked for. He's ST at Pittodrie and is always giving me pelters about Cove. 

Could you please advise how you managed to play 50 medal rounds in a year? 

Every golf club I know has Monthly medal competitions during the summer months, club specific trophies normally for a much loved and missed ex member, texas scrambles, club championship completions for singles, doubles and mixed tournaments 

At the very most there's unlikely to be more than 8 'medal' completions per club per season. 

Therefore... Were you a member at approximately 7 golf clubs? 

Or do you talk nonsensical poop in a futile attempt to impress? 

I'm not an afc chat weirdo, just a normal weirdo. I monitor posters musings from afar. 

You appear to have grown up a bit which is a good thing. Keep it up shorty. 

Yoga is renowned as being the best way to reach ones inner self. 

Also beneficial for expunging trapped wind.

Both will help the old man become a better person. 

Maybe. 

On 12/08/2020 at 12:42, tup1 said:

Oh aye, I did mean get them out by chase them, sorry I never picked up on what you meant there.

I foresee an explosion of positive tests over the next few weeks, I can't see Scottish football handling it too well if our current efforts are any indicator. The politicians have said they have their finger on the trigger.

Interesting times ahead for Scottish football.

 

Most unlike you to back down from potential confrontation with an apology and politeness. 

Good to see that moderators have taught you a lesson in being humble.